Wednesday, August 22, 2007
I don't want to jinx myself by announcing this to the world but I have to shout this out to everyone:
Jake is finally potty-trained!
(There are no letters large enough, fonts fancy enough, or colors bright enough to do justice to the excitement I want to convey here.) Did I mention how much I hate potty training? Oh, yeah, I hate potty training. It's pretty much the worst part of parenting for me so far. I think that someone should start a potty training camp where I can send my kids and they don't come back until they are completely potty trained. I would pay large sums of money for such an opportunity.
So we've had 7 glorious accident-free days and I really think we are in the clear! It's about time...we've been working on this for a year and he just turned 4! Yay for you, Jake!
From the potty training manual for Jacob E.M.:
Note: Do NOT try the following. It is completely futile. I repeat, failure to comply may lead to serious frustration on the part of maternal parental figure.
1. If he poops his pants in a corner of the house every day, put an x on the floor with masking tape to remind him that he can't go poopy there. Remove tape once all corners have been marked.
2. Buy him any toy in the store and make him earn it by keeping his underwear dry and clean for three days. Try to the keep the toy away from him for two months.
3. Have him run around naked all day. Explain to neighbors why he is naked and that you really aren't white trash.
4. Make chart after chart and tell him, "Each time you go potty you get a sticker. After _____ number of stickers you get ______."
5. Have daddy handle it.
6. Tell him all his friends go to the potty, that he can't go to swimming lessons or preschool or play at the Ikea kid's drop-off until he goes to the potty all day.
7. Make him wear one of his baby sister's size 4 diapers because you're out of pull-ups.
8. Move to a new house and show him all the new potties. Inform him that we could not go to the potty anywhere else in our new house. Repeat: No poopies in the new house. DO NOT get angry when he gets in the van and poops his pants.
DO try this: Wait until the kid is ready! This is easier said than done...but just do it.
Posted by Kirbell at 2:38 PM