Tuesday, October 9, 2007

Dieting Questions

As I get ready to go on my trip to *HAWAII* and am making the last minute futile attempts of losing 10 pounds before Saturday, here are some important questions:

Do I gain more weight eating a package of M&M's all at once or spreading it out over a week?

What time of day is the best time to eat something unhealthy and get away with it- in other words, should I have cookies for breakfast, lunch or dinner?

Celery = healthy
Frosting = unhealthy
Celery + frosting = zero, because they cancel each other out?

How many M&M's can I substitute for one palm-of-the-hand size piece of chicken?

I read an article that you can lose weight by laughing: http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/articles/A40731-2005Apr9.html
Do I really have to laugh or does fake laughing count?

You're not supposed to skip breakfast...so is it better to eat cake for breakfast or nothing at all and risk not getting your metabolism started for the day?

You should get adequate rest, so should I sleep an extra hour after I've been up with the baby at night instead of going to work out?

All important questions.

6 comments:

Amy & Mark said...

Earthshatteringly important questions! I wish I had answers . . . This is hilarious! Have a terrific trip to Hawaii!!

Anisa said...

My husband is going to Hawaii without me in a couple of weeks. Therefore, I am going to put on 10 lbs instead of losing it. However, here is some weight loss advice from someone who has done it....
First, run, run, run... until you feel like you are going to die.
2nd, if you only allow yourself a certain amount of calories for the day, then eat the treats for breakfast... that's what I did!!!
3rd, any thing else that is just too tempting (like m&m's) must be dumped down the kitchen sink and turn the disposal on. Don't put it past yourself to get them out of the garbage. They must be destroyed!!!

Cami said...

Wow!
I'm sending a link to my sis-in-law (she's a dietician). She'll laugh her head off.
Listen to Anisa. Anisa knows. Have you seen this girl? Her wedding dress probably sags on her now.

Jessica said...

Man, I just can't figure out why you think it will be futile?

(I would totally do that cake to start your metabolism thing...that's totally my mentality.)

Pinspot said...

Thank you, Kir, for helping me burn a few calories by laughing. That will most likely be all the workout I get today!

mindy said...

ha ha ha!! Fabulously funny post!